Tuesday 14 August 2012

Gabby Finds Fish, and Kitten Pics

Hi to all you somebodypeoples! Member me? I'm Gabby! Sept that I donno if I really am Gabby acuz my somebodyhuman and the somebodypeople called Dogman all calls me lotsa and lotsa diffrent names! The humansomebody calls me Gibgabs and Gobby when I eeeeew at her or when I reeeeeeeeeew to telled her that she's leaved me outside the bedroom or the bathroom door. And Dogman calls me Little Gibgabs and Come On Then and they both call me Stinkypants when I go in the litter tray and do a poopoo. But I can't help making a stinkypants acuz I just can't!

And the humansomebody calls me scruffbag too acuz I like to dunk my beautiful neck furrs in my yummy stinky foods and get them all messy, and she can't never clean it all out acuz my lovely neck furrs are so thick.

And I've had lotsa and lotsa fun here sept with stinky Milliecat who didn't like me when her tummy growed real big and real, real fat. Hahaha, she's a fatty and I gotted to bounced on her fatty tummy lotsa and lotsa, acuz you can jump real high when you use a fatty tummy as a spring board! But then you gotta run real, real fast acuz she'll chase you and scream bad words at you and wanna rip your tail off! But Millie goed away somewhere ages ago and I didn't seed her since, so that's Ok. My humansomebody says that if you want to see what Millie's been up to, and pictures of her babycats, then you should go to The Moonspun Blogwhere there's lotsa and lotsa pictures of the stinky babycats. For now though, here's a teaser.


But anyway, nuff about her. I's writed this to telled you all about the mazing thing that happened me today! I love my stinky goodness. I eated and eated and eated and then I ask for some more till my humansomebody gives me another name, fat little pig! Fat little pigs must be cute, acuz I know I am! But today, she sayed to us, "right, girls. I think it's time for a treat for you to celebrate the new arrivals". I didn't know what this meaned but that's Ok. The humansomebody says a lot of words and I don't know what they meaned, so I just said eeeeew in a very nice voice and I sitted on her foot and I waited. And then she wented to the kitchen and I sayed eeeeew again acuz I'd felled off her foot when she moved! And then I heared her making that noise that she sayed is a tin opening but that I know is the noise that means I'll be getting new stinky goodness. And I sayed reeeeeeeeeew, in a very loud voice so's she'd member I was here and that I was only a babycat and that I was real, real hungry and that I really wanted some stinky goodness pleeeeeeeaseeeee! And then I smelled it.

Somebodypeoples, I don't know the words for the smell acuz it was sososososososo good! It maked me sitted down on my cute little bumbum with a plop, and then ask in a real, real, real loud voice that I wanted my stinky goodness nooooooowwwwwww! And then Tiacat camed into the kitchen too, and she smelled it and even she sayed miaowwwwwww for a long, long time! And you know what? That horrible humansomebody laughed at us! She did! And she maked us wait and wait forever and then forever again till I thinked that my belly was eating itself!

And then she gived it to us. Somebodypeoples, I never eated anything like this before. This was the bestest foods ever in the whole wide world, and even better than a drink from a mummycat! And I eated and eated and eated for a long time, and I didn't even mind when Tiacat camed and pushed her stupid big head into the dish and stealed some of my stinky goodness for herself. She never does that normally acuz she doesn't like my stinky goodness, but this stuff was too good not to eated! My humansomebody sayed that they were called Pilchards, a kind of small fish, but I don't know what a fish is anyway, and I don't care acuz I was too busy eating as much as I could!

And I eated so fast that when I was done, my belly was as fat as I was! And then another funny thing happened me. I feeled this strange feeling and then some air camed outta my mouth. And the humansomebody laughed till she nearly couldn't breathe and she telled Dogman that I'd just did my first burp and that I didn't know what to do (human note: she really didn't. She was so confused and just kept looking round her at her own belly as though daring it to try it again). And then I got this nother strange feeling and then my belly did a funny jerk! And then another one! And then another! And my humansomebody laughed at me again! (human note 2: when the hiccups started, I really was struggling to hold it together. She kept sniffing her own belly as though trying to work out what sort of a frog she'd swallowed! If you've never heard a kitten with the hiccups, you've missed out on one of the sweetest little noises).

And then I leaved the humansomebody and I goed onto the sofa and I had a long sleepy. Achaally, I's got a photo of me sleeping like that from a long long time ago that my humansomebody sayed is only a couple of weeks. Whatcha think?


Ok, I can't think of nothin else, so byebye! And go see Milliecat's stinky babycats at The Moonspun Blog!

Monday 13 August 2012

Millie Becomes a Mummycat!

Hihihihi friends! Sorry I haven't writed in ages, but I's been too busy with getting fat and stuffs, and anyway, my human's been working so hard for us when she comes home that she doesn't really have much time to sit down and writed for us. But this is such an important thing that happened to me that I gotta tell!

Well, you know that I went to stay with a mancat, right? A couple of weeks after that, I noticed that my girlcat yummy tummy was disappearing andI was getting as fatt as boring old mummycat! I didn't like it and I tried to stop eating so much yummy foods, but I couldn't help it. I was soooooooo hungry all the time! And my human kept giving me stinky kissies and telling me this was great and wasn't I clever and all and it was just yucky cuz she always tries to kiss my yummy tummy, and I didn't wanted any somebodies to see it when it was so yucky and fat!

And then, a couple weeks later, I was asleep minding my own business when something kicked me in the tummy!... From the inside! I jumped up with a biiiiiig miaaaaaaaoooooow! And then I runned to the human acuz I was a bit ascared. But she said it was Ok and it was just the babycats. Babycats? What babycats! I didn't have no babycats in my yummy tummy! I didn't! I didn't putted them there so they couldn't be there, and I didn't eated any for lunch neither!

Soon I feeled lotsa and lotsa little kicks and I didn't like it. So I cried at the human until she rubbed my big fat tummy acuz then the kicky things that aren't babycats would stop kicking me and go to sleep.

But then yesterday, I gotted to feeling all funny. And I don't know why, but I felt the urge to go look for quiet, dark, small places and then dig. And I did that and my human taked me away and she, well friends, she taked my temperature! How horrible is that! She actually stuck that thing where it had no business being! But I'm a good girlcat so I letted her. And then she said, "Uh-oh, Millie, looks like today's the day. Hope you slept well last night!" I didn't know what she was talking about, so I just carried on digging.

And then she pulled me out from behind the sofa and cuddled me on her knee, and then, friends, the strangest thing happened. My big fat tummy took on a life of its own, and it squeezed! It was a big one and
I didn't know what to do, so I hided my face in the human's arm. And then another one came! And then another one! And this went on for ages, and the human called Dogman back from his nephew's christening,
but when he camed in, I decided that whatever was going on, I'd stop it cuz for some reason, although I love him, I didn't want him there. So I maked my tummy stop squeezing until the human sayed a lot of
sorries to Dogman and asked him to hide out in the bedroom.

But soon, my tummy was squeezing so hard that I knew I needed to push. And I pushed and pushed and pushed so, so hard and it was so tiring. And I keeped pushing for what felt like forever, and it was really
hurting me and I didn't like it, so I taked the human's arm in my paws and I pulled it in real close to my face and I held on and hided my face against her. and I pushed some more.

After a while, she sayed "Well, Mill, that's that then. There's nothing coming." And she phoned the vet lady people who was having a weekend off but who camed specially to the house just to see me. And
the human held onto my head real tight and the vet ladypeople put her finger, well, I can't even say where! She said she was checking to see if I was dilated, but holy Cod it hurted a lot! I screamed and screamed and screamed and tried to bite the human and the vet ladypeople and then I screamed some more. And the human's eyes were leaking right off the end of her nose, and even the vet ladypeople was sad and gived me a cuddle. And then she telled the human that I wasn't dilated and that I would need a section. I didn't know what that was, so I just carried on doing my best to push.

And then the vet ladypeople putted me in a PTU with a nice soft bed in the bottom, and she taked me away from my human! I wasn't like my mummycat. I didn't cry as I left, mostly acuz I was still too busy pushing to take any notice. And then we went to the horrible vet place and we waited a while till the other vet lady people arrived. And the nasty vet lady people who hurted me is really quite nice and she cuddled me and telled me what a good girl I was for pushing while we waited. And then... And then it all went dark.

Next thing I know, I'm awake, but it's so, soooo cold! I'm shivering and shivering despite being on a nice, warm, heated blanket. But it's just so cold! A lot of my tummy furrs had been stolen too! And I had a big pain in my tummy too.

And then something sayed "eeeeea!" And I jumped up and looked everywhere. And there was things in the cage with me! Teeny, tiny things that sayed "eeeeea!" and squiggled around all over each other. And I feeled real sorry for them, cuz if I was cold and I was a big girlcat, they musta been freezing! And so I pulled them all in close to me and I gave them a bath to clean off the horrible vet stink and warm them up a bit. And then, friends, then one of them got hold of my nimple and started to drink milk! And suddenly I understood. I knew now all about what mummycat had told me about babycats was true. I knew that these were my babycats and that they needed me. I still didn't know how they gotted here, but that didn't matter. They were
here and that was all there was to it.

So I pulled them all up against my tummy and didn't even say weeeeow when they climbed all over my hurty bits while they tried to find a nimple.

And then the vet ladypeople came and taked one of them away from me acuz he was limp and not moving and very, very cold. And I cried for him, but she just cuddled my head and tole me not to worry. She taked
him away and worked on him and feeded him some milk and he drinked it. But when she put him back with me, he still wasn't moving, wasn't searching for a nimple like the others were. He just lay there.

And thenshe put usall back in the horrible PTU and she taked us home to my human. And she sayed to her that the little boy probly wouldn't make it through the night. But my human doesn't give up. After all, she saved my brother Paws last year!

I settled down with my babycats after giving the human lotsa and lotsa head bumpies and loves, and I didn't even cry when she taked my small boy away. And he was real cold again, not lifting his head and she says he was hardly even breathing. So she held him in her hands for a long time and just breathed on him to warm him slowly. Then she taked him to the radiator and held him above the warm air and then she rubbed him hard all over and keeped rubbing and rubbing and rubbing. And every time he tried to lift his head, she whisked him in against my tummy and to a nimple, but he was still too weak to hold on. But she keeped working with him, forcing him to wiggle and squiggle and put his head up probly just to get away from the rubbing! But she knows that that's what mummycats do with a very weak babycat. I didn't though, cuz I've never been a mummycat before. And after a long, long while, he gotted must stronger, so she putted him in with me onto another heat pad and put him right against my tummy and he started squeaking and searching for a nimple! And then everybody went quiet.

She gotted up loads to check us during the night, specially light red boy who was the weak one, but he was still here this morning and is still moving around! She's just about to weigh them all again, but so that you know, here's their birth weights.

  • Apache (dogman's name acuz she has a patch over one eye (she's a tortie) and the human sayed when she picked her up "is that a patchy one?" and it stuck: 86 grams. She's the smallest!
  • Stripe, another tortie with a stripe down her nose: 92 grams.
  • Light red boy: 92 grams, so he's not the smallest!
  • Grey boy (he'll either turn out to be a light cream boy or a bluecream girl, so watch this space), 97 grams.
  • Dark red boy, the fatty, 107 grams!

They're all such good weights, and 5 is a lot for a first time mummycat too!

My tummy still hurts, friends, but I've been such a good mummycat all night, sept for when I sit on them by accident and my human hasta rescue them when they squeal. And I love them so, so much!